The Second Time I Called the Police

I was convinced that once I was able to gain some space from John I would finally start to feel safe. In my fantasies of what it would be like without him lurking behind every corner I turned, I was finally able to breathe freely and deeply again without the constant fear I had felt … Continue reading The Second Time I Called the Police

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Mandated Reporters

Because I am a teacher, I know the ins and outs of what happens at a school.  I also know the legal requirements and the rationale behind them.  One of those requirements is that anyone who works with children is considered a "mandated reporter" by DCF.  This means that if they suspect any type of … Continue reading Mandated Reporters

I Remain

"God only gives you what you can handle" ........"Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger"... I've heard these phrases many times since I served John.  They are always spoken by well meaning people who likely don't know what to say so they rely on these common phrases.... but these words mean very little when you … Continue reading I Remain

You Are Loved

It's really easy to get lost amidst the stress and the drama of a divorce.  It's too easy to forget that you are loved.... to easy to feel lost and alone.  This is especially true when the person that you are divorcing is controlling and abusive.  I felt myself withering away.  There were times that... … Continue reading You Are Loved

Unexplained Bruises

Time went on.... the environment continued to be toxic.  John started hiding whiskey in the kitchen.  I'm not sure if he knew that I knew about it or not, but I watched each day as the bottle quickly emptied and was replaced by another.  This only strengthened my fear of sleeping in the same house … Continue reading Unexplained Bruises

The First Time I Called the Police

Yesterday, I heard an employee of a domestic violence agency speaking on the radio.  She was telling the story of my marriage.... summing John up perfectly.  It was as if she had lived my life.... or watched it unfold somehow.  One thing that she said that really resonated with me is that many people think … Continue reading The First Time I Called the Police